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loves_a_drug [userpic]

Girl's Dressed In Yellow Covered In Wine

August 21st, 2007 (11:24 am)

current location: My Bedroom in sunny old Pennyborough
current mood: relaxed
current song: Momentum- The Hush Sound


What's so damn great about it? I mean don't get me wrong i'm not looking to die anytime soon but why does everyone make it out to be such a wonderful thing. The way I see it is you live you die and it's all part of a cycle. All part of a plan.

How is it that in the few years your given you supposed to make a mark. I mean not everyone can be an actress, a singer, A famous spokesperson. Some of us don't even make a splash in the body of water we call life.

I mean by grade 11 you should know exactly what you want to be and it should be somthing big like a doctor, nurse, scientist. Somthing along those lines. But what if unlike the rest of the population you dare to be different? You dare to question all these cliche jobs and decide to take another course? Well then you don't really get much help from the school systm.

The schools frown upon students who say you know what I want to be a piercer, a tattoo artist, a bartender. All growing professions in the world today yet still they have prejudice towards them. I'm one of those select few that stand out from the crowd and chose the less used road.

My dream is to be a rockstar singing in front of millions of kids every night but I don't really see that dream coming true in this lifetime. MY more likely career choice is bartender. Somthing about that profession just appeals to me. I mean I hardly ever drink but it just seems as though the profession would suit me. Would suit my style. ON the side i'd also like to write novels. I already have three started and one in the thought process. I know unlike the rockstar dream this is somthing I can accomplish. Writting is somthing that makes me happy.

Ultimitly in the end you should be doing somthing you love somthing that makes you smile and feel accomplished. Somthing you love to do. Somthing that makes you happy.

The One You Love To Hate

(P.S. More entries to come soon)

loves_a_drug [userpic]

Beautiful Things Don't Always Stay That Way

February 11th, 2007 (05:09 pm)

current mood: Shoot me now.
current song: Like Eating Glass- Bloc Party

I fucking hate Nickleback. I hate them so much. Their on TV right now, on the loud channel.... How is that considered loud?

Anyways i'm back again because I basicly have no life and don't feel like doing my homework. It's only english. I know how to speak it so who really needs it.

Anyways yesterday I went on a little field trip to Chapters. In other words I made my mother drive me cause it was to damn cold for me to walk. I managed to spend $86 in one trip. I'm cool I know no need to tel me. I like my books what can I say but i'm pretty sure the lady who rang through my purchase thought I was weird she kept giving me these weird looks. Sketchy. The books were heavy and the bag broke which was terrible because my beautiful books fell in the snow. I felt like crying. I didn't.

But anyway as you can tell i'm insane and most definitley need some professional help. Who knows maybe one day you'll read about me in the paper. I figure the headline will be something Eye catching and unforgettable. I can only hope.

In other news Today I found me basicly brand new Piano... uh or should I say Keyboard whatever you want to call it shoved under my bed. I think I got it to Christmas's ago and only played it once. That's not the point though. So with this discovery i've decided to take up the Piano and Guitar and again. I already know how to play so what not practice and put my talents to good use. So maybe one day instead of you reading about me going insane you'll read about me being a famous Rock star. I wish. A girl can dream though right?

The One you Love to Hate.

loves_a_drug [userpic]

I Want A Lover I Don't Have To Love I Want A Boy Who's So Drunk He Doesn't Talk.

February 9th, 2007 (06:37 pm)

current mood: thoughtful
current song: Cell Block Tango- Chicago the movie

I'm back!
Yeah I know it really hasn't really been long since I last posted but whatever i'm bored.

So...yesturday I went to my schools Semi-Formal.... intresting I know. It wasn't to bad, there was some ok music and I was there with a few friends so it was all good. I even bought a cute little black dress for the occasion and dolled myself up. Fun I know.

However the big thing I hate about dances are the slow songs. There terrible for the kids who never get asked to dance. I'm one of those lucky kids. I'm like a wallflower when slow songs come on. It's not all that bad though I guess...I mean things could be worse. Much worse. All in all the dance went pretty well and I had fun so it was a good night.

Second semester also started. Joy! I realy hate going to school these days. This is going to sound terrible but I don't like most of my friends. Were not really friends... were like the little outcasts that were thrown togther by fate. We eat lunch togther and talk between classes but for most of us when we leave school for the weekends we never see one another outside of school.

I think I really only have two or three real friends in that entire school. We arn't very close either but that's the way I like it. That's the way I want to keep it. I don't like letting people get close. I don't like letting people know your secrets, gain your trust, becoe your friend. In the end it always takes a turn for the worst and you always end up hurt.

In other news Valentines day is fast aproaching. Am I excited?

Of course not. Why would I be?

I don't understand what's so great about valentines day. It's another commercial holiday with the sole purpose of making you buy a bunch of shit no one really needs. I will be spending this Valentines day all alone just like every year and that's fine I really don't care. That's a lie I guess I do care a bit.

I don't understand. No guys like me. I'm always the nerdy friend to the girl every guy wants. Guys think my friends are hot but not me. I just don't get it. Am I ugly? Fat? Loud? Dumb? To Shy? I mean really what is it? Is because I don't turn into a giggling blob whenever a guy tells a bad joke or that I don't pretend to be stupid just to get a guy to notice me? Is it that I don't wear skin tight low cut tops and tight low cut jeans? Is my hair to dark? My skin to Pale? I really want to know why i'm never the girl the guy wants. I mean sure i'm not perfect but am I really that bad?

I have a variety of friends and they always try to help me get some guys it never works. One told me to pretend I don't know how to do somthing and to laugh at all his jokes even if they arn't funny. So what am I supposed to do lie about who I really am?

Another one of my frieds is lets just say "Friendly". Every guy wants her. Every guy she wants... she gets. She always has a boyfriend. She's never alone. Guys always say she's hot and they seem to love her personality but shes just like what I mentioned above.

So I don't get it do guys only like the easy ditzy girls that arn't all that intelligent? I really don't know. I really don't understand why not even one guy seems to like me... or even think i'm attractive. For once in my life I wish a guy would think I was pretty or beautiful or even cute. Is that really that much to ask for?

The One You Love To Hate.

loves_a_drug [userpic]

The Day the Music Died

January 19th, 2007 (09:22 pm)

current mood: Bah i'm angry.
current song: Chamber of Cartridge- Rise Against

School is Gay.
Well at least that's what all of the cool kids are saying. So I suppose I may as well go along with the Fad. Oh i'm so scene it hurts.

No but seriously i'm sorry for that random outburst but school really does suck. First semester is almost over. 3 more days then come exams and such and I really don't see a point in going to school anymore. I only have one exam this semester and my time would be better spent at home.

The exams in Math. Blah. I hate math I don't remember all the shit we learned at the beginning of the year. Why would I?(Who does?) I think as long as you can add, subtract, multiply, and Divide your all set. The rest of it seems useless and time consuming to me. Aside from Math I also have Religion which sucks balls(To many veiw's that I disagree with), Gym is just blah...well because it's Gym and Art is overly stressful.

The one subject i'm good at and used to love is now the one subject I hate. Oh how the world disappoints me. I as of now only have two culminating Tasks due Thursday and a handful of other projects due that day as well(mostly art). Tonight howvever i've decided to Boycott homework. A night to myself to do as I please.

So to all of you overly stressed Teens studying hard for your exams and running around in a flurry trying to finish projects in time, tonight I laugh at you. So here I am sitting sitting with my laptop on hand, my fingers moving rapidly over the keyboard a water bottle to my left laughing at your misfortune. However tomorrow night the tables will be turned and i'll be the one hurrying to finish everything I need.

A fair trade don't you think?

The one you love to Hate.

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